Me: *is wandering thru the dense jungle plants* Hey, where is everybody? *comes up behind y'all* There you are!

Me: ACK! *is lost and confused* Where am I!? Who are you!? OMG! O_O!!
Mac: She hasn't had coffee in a while... just ignore her.
Me: Wait!? How long have we been here?
Mac: Uhm... a very long time while you were busy trying to act like a responsible adult.
Jack: What is this... responsible adult you speak of?
Mac: *sighs* Someone get me out of here and back to my houseboat... please?
Me:
Mac:

Sanguine: <pops up uninvited, dusts self off, and stands between MacGyver85 and Jediferret> Hello. You heard about Pluto? That's messed up, right? <points at anaconda> I like snakes.

Mac: Quick! Get it! We can use it to ward off Murdoc!
Me: What about Pluto? You talking about Pluto the dog? Or Pluto the planet?
Mac: It's not a planet anymore...
Me:
Jack: Yay! More friends for our adventure!

Me: Pluto will always be a planet!!!!
Mac: Fine. Whatever.
Me:
Mac: *mutters* it's not...
Me:
Jack: Uh...Is someone gonna get that snake?
🐍

Sanguine: <grabs MacGyver85 in a bear hug> Exactly! I believe in a solar system with nine beautiful planets who are loved regardless of size and chemical composition! <sideways glance at Jack> Judging by the speed that that snake's headed for the water, I'd say it's either found something to eat or it smells a female. If you really want it, I'll get it for ya, but I'm not carrying it the whole trip.

Bystander: How did I miss this? This looks like so much fun!!

Me: *hugs Sanguine back* You, my friend, are awesome! (to Barry) Hi Bystander!
Jack: If we caught it,I could sell it for a fortune...
Mac: No! Absolutely not. We are not bringing a giant snake with us.
Jack: Come on, Mac!
Me: You heard him, Jack. No snakes. So what exactly are we doing in this jungle?

Sanguine: Catching tropical diseases? <turns down the snark> Or maybe you're looking for treasure or archaeological artifacts? Or maybe you're just running from the cute British dude I passed up a while back? <shrugs innocently>

Me: The first option sounds like me!

Jack: Murdoc. Is. Not. Cute. *glares at Sanguine*

Me: *facepalm* Oh yeah! I forgot to mention that I saw him on the way here! *teasing* I dunno, Jack, some of us ladies think he's charming...

Mac:

Jack:

Me: I'm kidding... or am I?...



(Do you think we should narrate what Murdoc is doing? Or do you think Aussie will come back?)

(Not sure, unless one of us -like me, since I haven't joined in yet- decides to join up on Murdoc's side. Aussie will probably be back eventually, but I can't say when)

The anaconda, distracted from it's pursuit of a leisurely swim, stops to listen to the conversation. It coils up, tastes the air with its tongue and rests its head on its coils. Humans are strange, it muses.

It feels a vibration through the forest floor and turns, tasting the air again. Another set of humans are approaching. These ones are different. The anaconda can smell the wickedness rolling off the curly haired one. It coils in the air like smoke...

The anaconda, curiosity piqued, uncoils and slithers in for a closer look.

Mac: Hold still everyone!

Penny: What is it, Mac? *turns around* SNAKE! AAIIEEEEE!

Jack: Penny! Stop screaming and just let me...

The anaconda, deafened by the screech, recoils back and frowns. Humans are noisy as well as strange, and that one with the hat looks like it's about to try something really stupid. The anaconda recalls eating someone wearing a very similar hat once, and having indigestion for a week. It turns its head as the second set of humans enter the clearing. One of them gasps, then freezes.

Murdoc: Snake! *feels all his blood drain into his boots*

Everyone else: MURDOC!!!

The anaconda tastes the fear of the wicked, curly human. Frightened ones always have a better flavour. It lowers its head to the ground and sets off, picking up speed as it races towards its prey...

Sanguine: <sees Murdoc> <"Dream Weaver" plays> <snaps out of it> We're not just gonna let him get constricted to death, are we?

Me: No, we're not. *looks ready to fight the snake*

Mac: Where the heck did you come from?

Sanguine: We should find something to distract the snake so he can get away! Maybe we can find something tastier for it to eat that will draw it away, or maybe we can throw a stick or something to buy Murdoc some time!

(It's not a rule that we have to role-play as humans, is it?)

Me: I hear roadrunners can use there wings to distract rattlesnakes, then grab them and fling throw them headfirst into the ground until they die. Then they eat them. *stretches own wings*

Jack: You don't plan to eat it, do you?!

Me: Uh, no. Just get it away from Murdoc

Sanguine: Okay, I like the idea and I'm digging the enthusiasm---very creative---but since the green anaconda is the world's heaviest snake, I'm thinking maybe skip the flinging part and just focus on the distracting and getting away. Does that sound good? <pauses> Although, if we're trapped in this rainforest for any significant length of time, I'm thinking a giant snake wouldn't make such a bad meal, am I right? <glance at Mac>

Jack: Wait! I got an idea! *dives onto the anaconda, seizing hold of its tail as the snake flashes past*

Anaconda: ????!!!!

Penny: Jack! Be careful!

Mac: No, Jack! Let go!

Jack: *bumping along the ground* I got it! I got it!

The anaconda screeches to a halt, lifting its tail up to view the hat-human dangling from the tip. it hisses, opening a cavernous mouth and showing some very sharp teeth. In one sinuous movement, it coils around Jack, squeezing...

Jack: GAH! GET OFF!

Penny: Let him go! *rushes forward and hits the anaconda smartly on the nose with her parasol*

The anaconda turns to face its new assailant. This human smells frightened, but still attacks. Interesting. The human swings another wild blow, catching the handle of its club in the anaconda's left nostril! The anaconda shakes its head, but only succeeds in jamming the parasol more firmly into its sinuses. The female human lets go, falling into some bushes. the hat-human wriggles free of the anaconda's coils and runs away. The tall human with the floppy hair rushes in and grabs the female, dragging her out of reach. Then it pulls back its fist and punches the anaconda right on the nose!

Mac: OW! *shakes his hand in pain*

Anaconda! OW! Bugger this for a joke... *sneezes the parasol out and disappears back into the jungle*

Mac: *picks up the parasol, now generously coated in snake snot* Penny? Yours...

Penny: Yuck! Thank you, Mac.

A voice from some way up a tree calls down.

Murdoc: is it gone? Is it safe to come down now?!

(Oh my gosh, Rocket, I'm dying laughing right now. Poor snake! )

Sanguine: <has been cracking up, but stops laughing when she hears Murdoc in the tree> Hello! You heard about Pluto? That's messed up, right?

Oh my gosh, same!

Me: *hands on hips glaring at Murdoc* It depends on what you consider safe. We're standing in the middle of the jungle Murdoc!

Sanguine: <nods> She's right. As far as snakes go, you're probably better off down here than up there.

Murdoc: *screams and slides down tree so fast he slips and falls*
Me: *gets crushed by Murdoc* Oof! You're welcome. Get off me!

(don't wait for me guys, I don't even know when I'm likely to reappear! (feel free to write about me too if you really want!))

Sanguine: <helps Dragondog and Murdoc up> You should really be more careful. <picks a soursop from a tree and offers it to Murdoc> For you!

Me: What's that thing?
Penny: Oh! What is that? Can I have one? What does it taste like?...
Jack: Anybody else care that Murdoc is right there?!
Penny: Oh yeah. I forgot. *to Murdoc* Were you spying on us? That's not very nice, you know. Although it does remind me of that time tha...
Mac: Penny
Penny: *takes a breath and looks at Mac* Oh. Sorry.

Sanguine: <as if nothing in the world is wrong> It's a soursop. It tastes like a cross between a strawberry and an apple, but it's soft and custardy on the inside like a banana. Try one! Hey, you wanna hear a joke? There's a hitchhiker walking down the road, and he just can't get a ride. Then finally, somebody picks him up, and the hitchhiker says to the driver, "Oh, thanks for stopping. Everybody's afraid to pick up hitchhikers these days. I mean, how do you know I'm not a serial killer or something?" And the driver goes, "Well, the odds of two serial killers being in the same car together are astronomical!" <glances between Murdoc & Mac to see if there's any reaction>

Jack: That'd be funnier if we didn't have a killer in our presence right this moment.

Me: Oh hush, Jack. Haven't you heard that without ugliness, there can be no beauty?

Jack: *completely missing the point* Um, thank you for your sacrifice, I guess?

******5 minutes later******

Mac: *having finally pulled me off of Jack* Okay, enough of the insults, you two. Let's go.

(Not sure if that was any good, I just typed that spur of the moment)

(It was fine! Don't sweat it.)


Sanguine: <has spent the past five minutes wondering who's ugly and why everyone's so upset> I'm confused.

Penny: Me, too! Oh, I'm so glad it's not just me!

Sanguine: <raises fist> Confused people of the world, unite! ....But in some kind of central location that's easy to get to.

Penny: <nods> And somewhere that you can take a bus or something to get to so that you don't have to worry about memorizing a whole bunch of directions.

Sanguine: And we all need to have nametags so we won't have any awkward moments where we forget who somebody is!

Mac: Right. *folds arms and fixes Murdoc with his best stare* I know what WE'RE doing here, but what are YOU doing here?!

Murdoc: Well, I thought I was following you, but it looks like I also trailed a few visions of loveliness in the process. *smiles at Penny and Sanguine*

Me: Hmm, I have to say, he does have a certain charm about him. He's quite handsome for a bad guy, actually.

Jack: I thought you said he was ugly.

Me: No, Jack, it was a metaphor. Without ugliness there can be no beauty. Without evildoers like Murdoc, there can be no good guys like Mac.

Jack: Oh...

Me: *getting mad again* And you said I was ugly you little-

Mac: Please, let's not start this again.

Me: Fine. *folds up wings* One of us has to be mature, after all *smirks at Jack*

Jack: Why do I get the feeling this is going to last a while?

Me: I have a good memory.

Sam: Anyway now what?