It's in our nature... It's like when someone tells you not to look at something, you get the urge to look anyway.

Because it's easier to touch wet paint than to count the stars.

Personally, I'd rather count the paint and touch the stars. But that last is a bit of a challenge. Worth trying, though.

As Marty McFly says: "If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything"...

What kind of cheese is made backwards?

Edam = madE

The man knows his cheese!

Did you know...

The average human eats 8 spiders in their lifetime at night.

Yuck!!!!

Yeah, I knew that one.

Did you know that a Tupperware party begins somewhere in the world every 2.7 seconds...

My husband and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at
a nearby table.

My husband asked,' Do you know him?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he
hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my husband, 'Who would think a person could go on
celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started.....

WAY too funny!

Two women friends had gone for a girl's night out. Both were very
faithful and loving wives, however, they had gotten overenthusiastic
on the Bacardi Breezers. Incredibly drunk and walking home they
needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.
One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take
off her panties and use them.

Her friend, however was wearing a rather expensive pair of
panties and did not want to ruin them.
She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath
with a ribbon on it, so she decided to wipe with that.

After the girls did their business they proceeded to go home.

The next day one of the women's husbands was concerned that his
normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he
phoned the other husband and said .......
'These girl nights have got to stop! I'm starting to suspect the
worst. My wife came home with no panties!!'

'That's nothing said the other husband, 'Mine came back with a card
stuck to her butt that said .........
'From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you.'

lol

*facepalm*

What kind of stones are never found in the ocean?

kidney?


unless a dude with is in the ocean

Dry ones!

*runs and hides*

The Rolling Stones?

Garden Stones?

Ah! y'all're too clever by half! Here's another one for ya:

"What building has the most stories?"

A library.

What did Adam have none of, Eve had two, and everyone has three?

The letter E.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee . . .

*facepalm*

What do you say to a one-legged hitchhiker?

"Hop in."

I haven't been in here for ages and just went back a few pages and laughed about all the silly jokes... and I wanted to tell all people that want to travel to Scotland: There are rumors of a new Avalon sometime some year, no date settled yet, but maybe you want to connect that with the trip over the big pond.... just saying!

What can you put in a wooden box that will make it lighter?

Holes?

Avalon with RDA? (Still never be able to afford it... darn it.)

When is your mind like a rumpled bed?

When it isn't made-up!

Quite correct!

What 11-letter English word does everyone pronounce incorrectly?

That's a trick question, m'lady. ...and it's incorrectly!

Which is faster, hot or cold?