Why don't cats play poker in the jungle?

Too many cheetahs.

Must be because I'm no native English speaker, but erm... I... erm..

don't get it....

LOL. Gotta love it when you confuse the "foreigners" Lothy!

Cheetahs... Cheaters.

Couldn't make it across the language barrier! *shucks!*


Here's one that might translate easier:

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat?

A big furry creature that purrs while it sits on your lap and squashes you!

How do elephants talk to each other?

In Mumbo Jumbo

hehehehehe i was working at the school today and finished my lunch a little early so i thought i'd work some more on my drawing of luna (sheepy's dog). three of the kids came in to get a drink and looked at the drawing:

"wow!" said one of them "did you draw that?" and then another one said "that's fantastic!" then they picked up the photo and looked at it upside down. "is it a horse??" she asked.... hahahaha i worry about those kids sometimes....

i mean... a horse?!! it was so obviously a dog!!!

so sorry sheepy but upside down poor luna can apparently be mistaken for a horse

If a town's people have low IQs is the population dense?

My precious Luna? A HORSE???

hey sheepy!!! hope you like luna!!!!

horse my foot..... looks nothing like a horse!!!

Attached Image

OH
MY
LORD
!
!

That is sooooo pretty!!!!

Hope i did Luna justice... i couldn't get the dark shades quite right... i really need those 4B pencils GOOD OLD NYMPHY TO THE RESCUE!!!!!

Bootiful picture!!

What has more lives than a cat?

A frog-- because it croaks every night!

hahahaha croaks

(((LOTHY))) thanks lothy!!!

*tickles Sluggy*


What do you call a cat that has swallowed a duck?

A duck-filled-fatty-puss!

What do you call a country where every one has to drive a red car?

A red car-nation.

hahahahahaha quit it!! i'm tickleish!!!

duck filled flatty puss

red car-nation

hahahahahaha

Think we can make her pee her pants Lothy?

Where do you get virgin wool from?

~ Ugly sheep.

Erm... should I feel offended now...?

ugly sheep!!! (present company excluded of course sheepy) ...... ....... ...... what's that warm wet feeling trickling down my leg???

Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you?

That depends on whether you're a man or a mouse!

Oh, now that is interesting! For you it's bad luck when a black cat follows you?

I know it to be bad luck when a black (male) cat is crossing the street before you, but only from left to the right. If it goes from right to the left, then it is bringing luck.

And since I know you understand German:

Von links nach rechts, da pecht's. Von rechts nach links - Glück bringt's!



And I understood the cheetahs joke just well

to Sheepy

Erm... should I feel offended now...?

Only if you have virgin wool.


Is only bad luck if a black cat crosses your path in the dark... mostly because they hard to see and you trip over them.

Black cats don't bring bad luck at all.
I'm not superstitious at all. Only thing I refuse to do is walk underneath a ladder.
It has something to do with ghosts, longwinded story.

back at Astra, at least people understand my jokes


Sorry Astra, you know I adore you, right?

Touché

The avoidance of walking under a ladder isn't just superstition... it's plain common sense! Someone might drop something on your head or fall on you!



... and continuing the subjects of cats and wool...
Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool?

She had mittens!

*wanders in whistling off key*

*looks around*

This is nuts! I wonder if there's a record for the most posts to a single thread somewhere...

Do I win yet?

Bloody hell.
Spent a few hours playing an online game called The stone of Anamara, chapter 1

Great game. Scared the living daylights out of me at one point, but I can;t find chapter 2 anywhere?!?!

eed to know what's behind the door!!!! Need to know what's upstairs!

Three construction workers, a blond, an Aggie, and some other guy, were sitting on the 10th floor of a building they're constructing, and were about to start lunch. The blond says, "If I have another chicken salad sandwich in my lunch box, I'm going to jump off this building." The Aggie replies, "I know what you mean. If I have another bologna sandwich in my lunch box, I'll jump off with ya!" The other guy adds, "If I have another peanut butter sandwich in mine, I'll join you guys." The blond opens his lunch box, and sees a chicken salad sandwich in it, and leaps to his death. The Aggie opens his lunch box, and there's a bologna sandwich in it, so he jumps off. The other guy has a peanut butter sandwich in his, so he follows the other two.
The wives of the three construction workers were talking. The blond's wife sobs, "If only I'd known he didn't like chicken salad! I would never have made it again!" The Aggie's wife says, "Me, too. I feel so terrible!" They look at the third man's wife, and she says, "Don't look at me. He fixed his own lunch!"

Its not out yet. Have to be patient. I'm not good with patient.


I had to sacrifice a chocolate bar to a goat yesterday . It was either the chocolate or it would have eaten my whole backpack. Cheeky beast . It also slobbered all over my hat . It was some sort of stealth goat that snuck up behind us when we were having a break during a walk in the hills.
I have a replacement bar of chocolate now but its not the same.