[MiracleMac]

Jack, John and James were racing that, who could be in longest time in haunted house.

Jack was the first to get in and ten seconds later he heard:

- Red eyes, red eyes

and Jack ran out of the house.


Then John went in and 20 sec later he heard:

- Red eyes, red eyes

and John ran out.


Then James was last and when he went in and heard:

- Red eyes, red eyes

James said:

- Shut up or you have black eyes soon!

Then ghost ran out of the house.

[MiracleMac]

And again, John, James and Jack were racing that, which one have courage to jump from the cliff.

John went first to edge of the cliff and saw a women and the women said:

- Jump down.

John jumped, hit to the bottom and died.

Same happened for James.

When Jack went to the edge and saw a same women and the women said:

- Jump down

Jack said:

- Womens first

[denizen]

Keep em comin!

[MiracleMac]

How many peoples is need for making popcorn?

One holds the pot and others shaking the oven

[MiracleMac]

What one guy will do, when he have a cold?

Hes sitting next to the fireplace.

What that guy do, when he have really, really cold.

He'll set the fire to the fireplace.

[MiracleMac]

Finnish man came once to London and tried to cross the street during the traffic jam.
Police saw him and yelled:

- Did you came here to die?
Finnish man answered back:
- No, I came yesterday

[MiracleMac]

Jack, John and James were arrested from murder of Jay. And all of those three got death sentece. First was Jack and he got a question:

- You wanna die by shooting, hanging or in electric chair?
Jack chose Hanging and next morning he was dead.

Then John was second and he got the same question and chose the electric chair, but suddenly the electric chair was broken and they pardoned for him and he only got life sentece.

Then James was the last and accidentally John passed the James in hallway and quickly whispered for him, that the electric chair is broken.
Then James got the question:

- You wanna die by shooting, hanging or in electric chair?
James answered:
- I heard that, the electric chair was broken. I will choose the shooting.

[denizen]

Twisted. But funny.

[Grazer]

That'll be a win then.

[Daisy8577]

Nope, I'm winning again!! 😉

[Grazer]

and yet... you're not.

[Duckt tape]

Oh what a week. My poor dog hurt his paw and I was worried sick about him fortunately he seems ok now, I got an apartment which is good except for all the paper work mess, moving out mess, emotional mess and stress it caused. But now I can relax and enjoy my WINNING

[denizen]

Sorry to hear about the dog. Glad its not serious! Oh and by the way...


...I'm winning again!!!!

[Jediferret]

Not your not. I'm BACK to steal the win! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[denizen]

Winning again!!!

[Daisy8577]

Looks like I'm winning again!!!!😉

[Jediferret]

No way! I'm winning... as usual. Teeheehee

[denizen]

Okay guys. Enough kidding around. Let's just all admit that I'm the winner once and for all!

[Jediferret]

NEVAR!!! Cuz, I'm winning!

[denizen]

What was that? I'm what? Winning? Okay, cool!

[Jediferret]

That's just your imagination. The inside voices say I'm winning. I love winning.

[denizen]

Really? I love winning too!

[Jediferret]

Oh yeah? That's cool, except you're not winning... I am. teehee

[denizen]

That's so weird! I was thinking the exact same thing! That I was winning. By the looks of things...I am!!!!

[Jediferret]

Then you might want to get your eyes examined cuz you're certainly not winning, my friend. I am... see? I got it in my hands! *runs away*

[denizen]

Well, took your advice, had my eyes examined by a professional. Looks like I'm 20/20 so that's all good.

THEN

I had a relook and definitely saw I was winning. There you go!

[MiracleMac]

I won. Thats it. Period.

[denizen]

You did you did! Well done! Aand now im winning again!

[Jediferret]

Not if I'm winning. Heeheehee

*hides WIN* Good luck trying to find it. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

[denizen]

*Walks into a dirty, sleezy lookin' bar, toothpick in mouth, *

*Looks around slowly and sets eyes on the bartender, clenching the toothpick tightly with teeth*

*walks up to the bartender who in turn starts shaking nervously*

"I'm lookin' for someone who can help me find a WIN..."

*Bartender nervously points to the corner of the bar at a man sitting down to a drink*

*Eyes slowly close in on the man*

*Turning around, slowly make way to the seated man who is dressed in an old Stetson Marshall Hat, dirty brown coat, worn down boots and smoke blowing out of his mouth*

"I hear you are the man to talk to when it comes to finding a WIN"

*Man turns around and fixes his dark eyes on face*

"Who's asking?"

"They call me denizen, round these parts, but today the $200 in my hand is asking"

*The man rolls his cigarette in his mouth and drops his attention to my hand, slowly grinning...*