Mac wandered into a jewelry shop not far from the beach. Stacey didn’t have much in the way of jewelry, and he loved the idea of getting her something nice. He started looking over the cases.
His eye fell on a pretty pendent. It was gold, three delicate gold hearts intertwined with each other in a triangle shape. Perfect, he thought. What a great way to show her that she really is part of the family now. He also knew that Sam hadn’t found anything for Stacey yet, and might want to split the cost with him, making it from both of them.
He called the clerk over and pointed out what he wanted. “I’ll take a fourteen-inch chain, too. And can I get that gift-wrapped?”

Heading out of the jewelry store, his heart definitely felt lighter. He wondered where Stacey had gotten to. She’s probably calmed down and headed home by now, he thought. Nevertheless, he decided to head down to the beach for awhile before going home. Mac came down to the beach, looking out on his favorite spot, and stopped short. A blond girl sat out on the sand, about halfway to the water, looking out over the ocean. She was wearing jeans and a green shirt, like what Stacey had been wearing that morning. He stood there, wondering if he should head out to her. Of course, it might not be Stacey… for once, Mac couldn’t make up his mind about what to do.
Out on the beach, Stacey felt someone nearby. She turned, her face streaked with tears, to see the unmistakable figure of her father standing up on the sidewalk, maybe twenty yards away, watching her. Should she call to him? Did he see her out here?
Before she had time to do anything else, he was moving towards her. He obviously saw her, and recognized her. She decided to stay where she was, in case it turned out he was still angry with her.
Mac had decided to go out to his daughter. There were things he needed to tell her, and it couldn’t wait any longer. As he got closer to her, he saw that she was in tears. Oh, God. She’s been sitting out here for who knows how long, crying and hurting, and I’ve been worrying about me? He quickened his pace.
Stacey stood up to meet her father, and apologize for her behavior earlier that day. But before she could say anything, she was swept up in his powerful arms, and he whispered, “I’m sorry, honey.” She couldn’t answer, as she was crying even more now.
He looked at her, and had a hunch he knew what had been bothering her. “It’s your mom and dad, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it is. I just can’t seem to let them go.”
Mac held her close for a moment longer, then they sat down together. He put an arm around her, and she leaned against him. “Stacey, honey, I want to tell you why I’ve been so grouchy the last few weeks. This is a rough time of year for me. You’ve wondered about my family. My dad and grandma were killed in a car accident when I was ten, on December 14. Mom died of a stroke when I was on assignment with the Special Forces in Afganistan, fifteen years ago, also at this time of year. Grandpa Harry died in 1990. And there’s a lot more to that story.” Then he told her about his near-death experience of what seemed to him like just a few years before.
“When I leaped from that ship, I almost fell into the water. As the ship pulled away, I was hanging on to the dock, about to fall. Then Pete reached down to me, I grabbed his hand, and he pulled me up. I told Pete about it later, and we figured out that just as I grabbed Pete’s hand, the doctors were able to restart my heart for good. I still can’t figure out exactly what it was. I’ve thought sometimes that it was just a weird dream, but as the years have gone by, I’ve started to believe it was real. I can’t explain it, but if life has taught me anything, it’s that there are things that can’t be explained by science or rationality.
“I realized that death isn’t anything to be afraid of, but I must have lost touch with that over the years. The reason I’ve been so overprotective of you is that I’ve been really scared of losing you or Sam, the way I lost Mom, Dad, Harry, and so many of my friends… and I don’t think Pete has much more time, either. I’ve been living in fear, Stacey, and I’ve come to realize that it’s no way to go about your life. Living in faith is the way to go, but it’s a heck of a lot harder. But I think I can do it, if you’re here. Will you help me?”
Stacey looked up at her father. “Yes, Dad,” she answered, hugging him. “I’ll help you, if you’ll help me. I’ve realized that I’m really having trouble letting go of my parents.” She proceeded to tell him about her parents, about her mom’s drinking, her father’s busyness and denial, and all the rest. “I’ve realized that I’m scared, too, scared of losing you or Sam, and other stuff, too. But I guess you’re right, Dad. Fear sure isn’t any way to live your life.”
“Yep. Someone once told me, ‘If you’re afraid of dying, you’ll just end up being afraid of living.’ I think, really, faith and fear are opposites of each other. It’s very hard to walk in fear and faith at the same time.”
“I think it’s impossible,” she answered. “But Dad, there have been times when I really have been scared… of death…of the militia coming back for me… of so many things. I’ve been having nightmares a lot recently. I guess I’ve needed to know I’m safe, that I’ll be OK. I’ve wanted so badly to be protected, but at the same time, I’ve wanted to be independent. I’ve wanted to be on my own because I don’t want to lose you, too.”
He looked stunned. “I didn’t know that, Stacey. Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I… I don’t know. It’s not that I don’t trust you, Dad, it’s just, well, I guess I just didn’t know how to say it.”
“You can just say it, Stacey. You can just tell me, ‘Dad, I’m scared,’ and I’ll know exactly what you mean. We can talk about it if you want, or if you just need me to hold you for a little while, I will. That’s what dads are for, you know. To keep their children safe… and feeling safe.”
She nodded. “I promise I won’t be shy about it anymore. I better warn you, it may be coming out pretty frequently for awhile. I’ve been holding a lot of stuff in.”
Mac smiled at her. “That’s OK by me. I’m here. And as for your mom’s drinking and all the rest, well, that wasn’t your fault, you know.”
“I don’t know, Dad,” she answered. “If I hadn’t asked for so much… and maybe there was something I could have done to get that kid next door to stop obsessing on me. Maybe then none of it would have happened…maybe my parents would still be alive… maybe…” she started to cry again.
Mac placed his hand on her shoulder, and tipped her face up to meet his. “Stacey. Look at me.” She did, meeting her father’s warm brown eyes, and saw such deep feeling there she could hardly maintain eye contact. “You didn’t cause your parents to act the way they did. Whatever they did was their choice. Now, I never met your mom and dad, but I do know that even though they had their very human weaknesses, they loved you and would have given anything to protect you. And it sure as heck wasn’t your fault that they died. It was the fault of that crazy kid, whatever his name was, and by extension, the militia’s fault. Don’t let those nutcases get inside your head and make you think you were responsible for what they did to your family. You do, and they’ve still got you captive.”
“I guess I never really thought of it like that, but you’re right, Dad, as you usually are,” she said with a grin. “And I really love you, Dad,” she added. “I just want you to know that after Mom and Dad died, I thought I’d never find anyone who would love me this much, let alone want to take me in the way you have. I’m sorry about what I said earlier, about you not being my real dad. I must have sounded like a four-year-old!” She made a face, and Mac laughed at her expression. Stacey found herself giggling, too. After their laughter had died away, she looked up at him again. “You are my ‘real dad’… in some ways, you’re more of a dad to me than my own father was.”
Mac was speechless for a moment. “I can’t tell you how much it means to hear you say that,” he told her, his voice catching. “I don’t want you to think I’ve been trying to take your parents’ place. I know I never could, and that sure hasn’t been my intention. I don’t know much about raising a kid, much less a daughter. I’m doing the best I can with you.”
“I know you are, Dad. I’ve been a real pain the last few weeks, and I’m really sorry about that.”
“Well, I haven’t exactly been the proverbial Christmas angel myself.” He grinned, and they both laughed.
Sitting on the cold beach, wrapped in her father’s arms, Stacey looked up to the sky. Mac followed her gaze, and suddenly the clouds broke apart, and sunlight poured through, lighting up the water and warming both of them.