These were contest entries from a recent Washington Post Style Invitational. My favourite is, of course, the first one.

You just might need a new car soon . . .

. . . if every 3,000 miles, you change the duct tape.

. . . if your current one is worth less than the bribe you have to pay to get an inspection sticker.
. . . if it is your father's Oldsmobile.
. . . if your mechanic is storing part of his CD collection in your glove box.
. . . if hitting potholes is the only way to make the headlights come on.
. . . if your mechanic has to use his connections in Havana to get parts.
. . . if the panhandlers at red lights slip dollar bills in your window.
. . . if the OnStar lady keeps directing you toward a ravine.
. . . if the fuzzy dice are the only original parts. The left one, anyway.
. . . if the ashtrays in the back seat are full. – P. Hilton

I like the first one, too. It's the MacGyver signature series car!

This one was great! Hilarious!

So this is what Paris Hilton's been up to now that she's out of jail.

All very funny!

But this one...

*gasps*

Or you have the most commun:
....The car won't start and no repair is posible.
....You broke your foot from kicking the car to make it start.
....The car simple falls apart (Like in the film: The blues brothers)